Everyone has a breakdown

Well, my blog is all about honesty, and that I will try to keep up. So yeah, this weekend I had a little breakdown, and I just felt like everything I did was wrong, and I wasn’t good enough, even though I know that isn’t true, I just couldn’t stop thinking about everything, and how much I wanted to talk to someone about everything, and just cry it all out. I just needed it, you know? I just felt like the hole world fell down on me, and I wasn’t strong enough to keep it up.

But after having a little breakdown, I now feel much better, and today I even had a playdate, and yeah, that’s pretty funny, haha! Because the playdate was late, then I forgot the time, and when I looked at it, I needed to run to the school, to get Tyler, and then we all went to our house, and the kids had a really good playdate all together.

But yeah, I just really miss being able to talk to my mom at dinnertime, and having a sleep in, or being able to walk to my best friend’s house. I miss being able to have something to talk about.

Yesterday, they convinced me to go out, but I felt totally in the wrong place, all Matt’s and Jo’s friends were there, and I didn’t really know what to  talk about, or anything, I just felt like I was a bit in the way, and I know they want the best for me, and they like me, and all that, but sometimes it hard to see, when you feel a little alone, and I have no idear what to talk about.. But otherwise, I’m much better today, and I’m trying to keep my shit together and be strong. And in the end, when I’m finished over here, I’m so much stronger than before, because I can’t just take a plane back to Denmark, it takes over a day to get there, so I have to keep it together, and come out on the other side much stronger, and I always seems to find the things that are always messed up :b haha! I apparently have something to learn :b

Otherwise, I hope you guys had a good weekend<3

And thx to the people I’ve talked to this weekend, thx for the support :*<3

Big package from home!!

So, yesterday I received a big package from home, and I was soooo happy!! :D I can’t believe it has come! All my Christmas presents are in there, and some Danish candy (that I’m gonna save to a special day, when I need it!) I miss home, and my mom, and Danish Christmas, because their Christmas is so different over here, and I’m scared I’m gonna do/say something wrong.

But yesterday Matt bought me tickets to ‘the scarborough festival’ that sets on the beach, and it’s gonna be awesome! He will even drive me home (: And he bought me 2 extra tickets for my friends :b heheh (: So at least I have someone to go with :b haha (:

I can’t believe we’re in November already! The time goes by really fast, and even then it seems like there are ages till I get back home!

Matt’s going to work tonight, but I’m gonna skype with my best friend a bit later, I can’t wait to talk to her, and see her, and listen to her voice! After all that’s going on, I need to get a little Danish break :b

Og her er så lidt på dansk for mine danske venner (: 

igår modtog jeg en dejlig stor pakke fra familie/venner, og det var bare super dejligt at få en kæmpe pakke med alt i! Men hold kæft hvor jeg savner DK, dansk jul og alt der hører med til julemånederne. og det blir så mærkeligt at holde jul og nytår væk hjemmefra,  men senere skal jeg skype med denne skønne pige! :D Glæder mig for vildt! 

Og imorgen skal jeg samle min nye sengeramme, som Matt har købt til mig, siden jeg i øjeblikket kun sover på en madras :b haha (: 

Men ja, tiden går da en smule hurtigt, og er glad for jeg har fået venner herover der kan få mine tanker på noget andet, når livet blir svært<3 

Savner alle og enhver! og ønsker jer en herlig weekend! <33

Møs og kys fra mig :D

A lot going on, a bit confused

So, yeah, the weekend was a bit hard to me, I cooked Danish dinner for the kids (Matt wasn’t home) but I guess it’s too solid for them, because they didn’t really like it ): And I got in a fight with Brook, and I just had a bit too much ): Got really homesick the day after, being home in DK, no arguments, sleeping in, no loud kids in the morning, and so on, haha I guess after this experience I’ll never have kids, if they’re gonna behave like this :b hahah! :D

So Saturday we went out eating, and Sunday I had some friends over! :D Weee! 

I really love that I have my own car for use here, otherwise I don’t think I would have survived :b haha! :b But one of my front lights is not working ): But I hope it’s gonna be fixed soon! :D

I miss my family so much, my grandfarther even more! <3 And my best friend, mom and everyone! <3 Love you guys!! :*So yesterday I talked to my grandfaether, and I almost cried, I was so happy to talk to him, I do really miss him, and the rest of my family ): And it's gonna be soooo weird at christmas, not being at home with my own family, not celebreating on the 24th of December, and all that. ): 
But my mom has told me se sent me a big package, with all the christmas presents, and i can't wait to get it, just to get something from Denmark, from my family! And I can't wait to send my christmas present to them (: I hope they are gonna looove them! :D hehehe(: 

Well, for now, I'm a bit homesick, and the family is a bit crazy at the moment, so yeah, just getting a bit more homesick from that ): But! I'll survive! Like one of my friends told me  " Think about that nothing hasn't really been happening back home and what would you do if you went back home now? That usually helps me"
And that has really helped me, thinking about the situation, So I dont get that homesick, I'm glad that I have friends to talk to, and help me through some situations that are hard to talk to with your family, because they are not here. But all good, at least it's gonna be! 
Now I know that my grandfathers network is actually working propperly, and we can talk together over skype without it going out and so on (:

Have a nice week everyone, tomorrow I have a day off, and thursday aswell (: 

Having fun at the beach!

So today I had a day off, and I went to Florats beach with my friend Sofia, and met a lot of other people, and we did some BBQ :b it was a great fun, and I really needed to get out there, and get some other friends! :D And I actually met 2 other danish people! Oh yeah main! danish people rock! :b hahaha (; 

So on monday I have a playdate with another au pair, so I actually have something to do with Brooklyn on her days off (: So that's gonna be really good! 

Tomorrow, my plan is to relax! Sleep in, and just relax! :D hahahha ! (: 

I can't believe we're in November already! My best friend has her birthday on friday! And it's hard not to be there for her, and celebrate her ): But, I know that we will talk together (: I just miss being able to see her like every week /: 

So this weekend, Matt is on work like all friday, and saturday and sunday, soo it's gonna be a hard one Ö But I will handle it! :D 

I know have a plan, when I want to go out in the weekend, I can have a sleep-over at another au pairs house, and it's like 10$ for a cap from the city to her house, instead of like 100$ to where I live :b hahah (: So! And today I have remembered my sunscreen all day! :D So NO BURNS TODAY! :D 

Hope you all have a good week ! (: